Spoiler alert:
Thelema hard-core true believers might find the line of thought (deconstructive criticism) below slightly unsettling.
Intro
If I had, I would have slowed down my growing up process.
Growing up is quite essential, in my opinion. In modern terms, that would be defined as individualization and self-actualization or breaking out of social, institutional, educational, and family influences by becoming, well, a grown-up person, independent and free from bowing down to some authority.
No, I am not angry, frustrated, or appalled by what I am observing; it just doesn't compute:
Is Thelema, one of the most direct and quite loud doctrines out there regarding personal responsibilities and liberties, being squandered by private ego trips, astral (emotional) glamour, and neurotic tendencies by the very same people that are publicly proclaiming: "Do what thou wilt!"?
<deep sigh>
If we take this line of thought a bit further, there are what I perceive an old-aeon notions and games called: "Please, save me, for I am incapable of progressing on my own.".
I am always surprised by what I see here online or in real life and in person as well:
Growing up is quite essential, in my opinion. In modern terms, that would be defined as individualization and self-actualization or breaking out of social, institutional, educational, and family influences by becoming, well, a grown-up person, independent and free from bowing down to some authority.
Maslow, Rogers, Assagioli, and Rosenberg articulated Authenticity rather well.
In Thelema lore, this process and the resulting grown-up personal traits are mirrored in various texts, such as Liber OZ.
Observing dynamic situations in the Thelema Orders around the world today, I am particularly intrigued by the notions of the One Holy and True Order, One Teacher,
In Thelema lore, this process and the resulting grown-up personal traits are mirrored in various texts, such as Liber OZ.
Observing dynamic situations in the Thelema Orders around the world today, I am particularly intrigued by the notions of the One Holy and True Order, One Teacher,
and insistence on hierarchy, or shall we say theocracy, covering up or denying that rapes, emotional and mental abuses are taking place, etc.
No, I am not angry, frustrated, or appalled by what I am observing; it just doesn't compute:
Is Thelema, one of the most direct and quite loud doctrines out there regarding personal responsibilities and liberties, being squandered by private ego trips, astral (emotional) glamour, and neurotic tendencies by the very same people that are publicly proclaiming: "Do what thou wilt!"?
<deep sigh>
If we take this line of thought a bit further, there are what I perceive an old-aeon notions and games called: "Please, save me, for I am incapable of progressing on my own.".
I am always surprised by what I see here online or in real life and in person as well:
"advanced" aspirants who have been involved in mystical and magickal practices for decades, a priori and without even bothering to examine which neurotic inner tendency they are being played by, bow down to, and put on a pedestal, some author, lineage "leader," or head of an Order.
Hmmm.
Donating precious life energy to others is what is happening in such cases, it seems.
Hmmm.
Please, Order Leader, save me |
Donating precious life energy to others is what is happening in such cases, it seems.
Instead of looking deeply within and finding what is most alive there (whatever that is, maybe even, god forbid, quite apart from what Order rules state), most human beings look outside and a priori and without ever bothering to examine what they say and do, follow some authority.
And although the greatest spiritual masters in human history (not only our Master Therion but the Buddha, Krishna, Mohamed, Krishnamurti, etc. as well) have all said NOT to do that, a lot of human beings still meekly bow down to some authority.
Well, in my opinion, that’s just a phase in growing up, nothing more.
And although the greatest spiritual masters in human history (not only our Master Therion but the Buddha, Krishna, Mohamed, Krishnamurti, etc. as well) have all said NOT to do that, a lot of human beings still meekly bow down to some authority.
Well, in my opinion, that’s just a phase in growing up, nothing more.
A little child does that; a natural grown-up person doesn’t need to, do they?
These are all just little games that egos admire so much, in my opinion. In reality, NO outer authority can initiate you, give you, or grant you, well, anything, really.
These are all just little games that egos admire so much, in my opinion. In reality, NO outer authority can initiate you, give you, or grant you, well, anything, really.
Cognitive neuroscience, the hardcore science, unequivocally affirms that our experience is happening between our ears, not on the outside.
Furthermore, Crowley himself said:
"...the [A∴A∴] system which was given to me to put forward is only one of many. “Above the Abyss” all these technical wrinkles are ironed out."
- Magick Without Tears, ch. 9.
According to him, the A.'.A.'. is only one system, one of many.
So, what's with the One Teacher, One Order, One Truth notion?
I don't know, but it does smell to me like total BS.
Who am I, and what shall be the sign?
I do not need name and fame; I crave neither faint nor actual approval from anyone, the least of all from some Order Leader.
I don't know, but it does smell to me like total BS.
Who am I, and what shall be the sign?
I do not need name and fame; I crave neither faint nor actual approval from anyone, the least of all from some Order Leader.
There is nothing substantial that can come from any outside authority. Yes, we can cooperate, hang out, and have fun, but not at the expense of our freedoms and responsibilities.
Again, Master Therion himself said it would be best not to follow in his footsteps:
"...I certainly have no intention of “holding you down” to “a narrow path of work” or any path. […] It does not follow that a plan that I have found successful in my own case will be any use to you. […] Most teachers, consciously or unconsciously, try to get others to follow in their steps. I might as well dress you up in my castoff clothing!"
- Magick Without Tears, ch. 17
Far beyond childish little games and immature ego trips of "high-degree magicians" (from some religious corporation or not), might stand this line of thought:
“The Sempiternal A.’.A.’. Order is beyond political and personal human projections, hopes, and dreams. Only inner and intimate transpersonal realizations can link one with this Inner Order. No outside authority can do that.
“The Sempiternal A.’.A.’. Order is beyond political and personal human projections, hopes, and dreams. Only inner and intimate transpersonal realizations can link one with this Inner Order. No outside authority can do that.
It is a matter of complete freedom of self-regulated spiritual development. Thete is no coersion in spirituality.
There is no ‘One True Lineage’ or ‘One True World Teacher’, for such exclusiveness exists only in the vivid child-like human imagination.”
- me
- me
My friend, I love you very much.
ReplyDeleteYour blog posts from years ago have finally pierced through the blocks in my consciousness and I am finally, finally surrendering even my sadhana and all effort to my Devi, Sri Lalitha. (You may or may not remember me, but I commented on your other blog years ago as well.)
All through January 2020, I was making huge breakthroughs in sadhana, but I kept hitting this wall of total despair and limitation that I could not break. All my effort, my will, my training, my willingness to sit for hours every day, failed to break this inner wall. And finally I broke down and cried and said I give up, I can't find peace anymore. I prayed to Her like I had never prayed before. I allowed myself to witness all the negative emotions that came up and released them.
Then I was led to re-read your blog post here: https://kalitantra.blogspot.com/2014/11/attaining-ishta-deva-and-hga.html
And I FINALLY understood what you were talking about. When I read this years ago, I did not understand what you were saying. Now I finally understood and I know what to do. I am giving up myself to Her completely, I am giving Her complete responsibility for my spiritual work, my progress, my relationship with Her, and my beingness. It is such a relief to know that I am not in control anymore.
I love you and bless you. Thank you.